Archive | November, 2012

Ew! Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

3 Nov

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!

It’s so gross.

OMG, even *I* think it’s gross.

You would be amazed at how clean my kitchen is.  This is because (ewwwww!) we have a mouse.  (ewwww!)  

I miss having cats.  When I had cats, we never got mice no matter how much food we left around.  The cat smell would keep the mice away.  But now, we don’t have cats.  I miss my cat Katie.  She was the cat of my heart, and when she died, I really didn’t want another cat.  This is selfish of me, I know, but the truth is, it’s all I can do to keep up with the critters I’ve got.  I can’t take care of anyone else.  

Including a g-ddamn @*!(@*!!! mouse!  Ewwwww!

It was the hurricane.  I spotted it during the hurricane, and we figured the rain drove it indoors.  The Bishop promised to call the landlord to come and poison it with toxic poisonous poisons that would kill it dead dead dead and did I mention DEAD.  The landlord puts the toxic poisonous poisons OUTSIDE where the mice come in and then they die dead on their way into the house, which is rather brilliant and also doesn’t involve poisons out where Baby Peanut could easily eat them.  Although hopefully they don’t die in my walls.  But the Bishop only wanted to call the landlord if we saw it after the hurricane because, Bishop reasoned, maybe the mouse was inside because of the hurricane and after the hurricane it would go back where it came from because it would know, somehow, that we were going to have the landlord kill it dead dead dead with toxic poisonous poisons.  

But then the Bishop left a bowl of oatmeal out on the counter and when we came home and ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

And Baby Peanut is crawling on the ground!  And he puts everything in his mouth!  And now I’m afraid to let him crawl around down there so mostly I clean the floor by putting anti-bacterial wipes under my feet and skating all over it and if that does not sanitize my floor and kill mouse germs I DO NOT WANT TO KNOW SO DON’T TELL ME.

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