Archive | March, 2012


12 Mar

I am totally hooked on Pinterest.  It’s not even OK.  I have 3 boards that are my favorites.

One board is called, “For My Imaginary House in the Cote D’Azur.”  This is where I pin pictures of real estate pr0n. 

Another favorite is called, “Delicious Clutter.”  Here you can see my actual decorating taste, which seems to include a mookajillion books, tacky tzotchkes, toys and other dust collectors.  In this board, you can see people who do it better than me.  I look at this board when I want to be inspired to rearrange my clutter, which is usually immediately before I decide not to rearrange my clutter, mostly because I am deathly afraid of what is UNDER my clutter.  Strongly suspect it might be bugs, pink slime, mouse turds, anything that can give me MSRA, and the Lost City of Atlantis.  So you see, clutter protects us all.  And nobody (but me) will ever tell you that, but it’s the truth.  Clutter Keeps Us Safe.

Finally, I have a board called, “Smart Things.”  Among other things, I pin organizing and cleaning tips here.  Of course I will never do any of these cleaning or organizing tips.  For example, there is a tip for cleaning moldy bath toys.  Chaos’ bath toys are FULL of mold.  FULL of it.  They’re really gross.  I’ve even soaked them in bleach from time to time, to try and get rid of the mold.  But the mold… it lives INSIDE the rubber duckies.  And if you soak the outsides of the duckies in bleach, the mold inside just laughs at you and grows even more.  I really need to discard all the rubber duckies and buy new ones, but that seems so wasteful, doesn’t it?  So while I ruminate on that, I let my daughter play with moldy bath toys.  And believe me, this is still better than SOME of the things she plays with in her bath, and I’ll stop there.

Pinterest!  No need to improve your life, just pin lots of stuff!


Floory Grime, you’ve met your match!

12 Mar

I blog about as frequently as I clean anything, which will give you some idea of about how often I clean anything.  We’re having company today, but it’s my parents and my sister, and they don’t care.  Well, my mom will give me endless grief about it, but since I’m not sensitive about my housekeeping skills, I don’t really care.  

We were away in Florida.  We went to visit Bishop Mishegas’ grandparents.  They have a very clean house.  We also saw some kin of the bishop’s – a couple about our age who have a two-year-old daughter and they live in antiseptic splendor in this extremely enviable Craftsman house on the water in Ft. Lauderdale with comfortable yet sturdy furniture.  Their house was actually cleaner than the Bishop’s grandparents, who are famous for their clean house.  Their house was so clean it was frightening.  I look around houses like that and I say, “But where do they keep all their CLUTTER???”

When we got home, our house looked so filthy to my spoiled eyes, and so I actually cleaned it.  That is, I cleaned the living room, the kitchen (I have to finish the kitchen), and the bathroom.  My friend Tracy loaned me her steam mop (see previous post) and I felt compelled to try it out so that I can return it to her.  This was actually a HUGE incentive!  And now I’m thinking that there ought to be a high-end mop library where you can borrow fancy cleaning supplies but you have to use them within a certain time frame so you can return them.

As far as Tracy’s steam mop, well, it turned my floory grime into a floor.  Not even a grimy floor, just a floor.  Everyone in my family admired how shiny clean my floor was. 

Maybe next time I’ll dust.

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